Calendar Books by Allen James - Daily Reading

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Calendar Books by Allen James' posting for June 30th reiterates the Allen James formula for personal success, "I LIVE".

If you recall, a few weeks ago I introduced the acronym for my formula leading to personal success, I LIVE. Here I explain again as it's worth being reminded of.

I = Identify the goals to be achieved.

L = Liberate self from old ways of thinking.

I = Invest time and energy in doing what needs to be accomplished to attain identified goals.

V = Validate self regularly, assuring self of ability to accomplish your goals.

E - Embrace identified success after attaining it, even the smallest of successes. Enjoy and celebrate the victory.

Each and every one of us holds the potential to do great things, but we MUST draw from within and realize it is only through our own doing.

As always...keep looking up.    : )   AJ

Calendar Books by Allen James - Daily Reading - "The Journey: A Calendar Book

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Calendar Books by Allen James' posting for June 28th from "The Journey: A Calendar Book", reads...

"Remember, we all need our personal space" (James, 2012). 

Proxemics is defined as: "The study of the cultural, behavioral, and sociological aspects of spatial distances between individuals" (Wood, 2012). Included within this study is a discussion about personal space and the role which varying cultures tolerate or allow distance to play in nonverbal communication; and like every other aspect of our world, individuals differ in their level of tolerance/allowance of their personal space as well.

This is an important bit of information to be aware of in your journey to personal success. Others may or may not let you know if you're "in their space". Discomfort while communicating can "turn off" those with whom a message is being conveyed. A few years ago I was working with a group of students on resume writing. Having established a positive rapport I was making great progress in getting what needed to be covered, covered within the time I had. Another instructor came in and walked around the room to assist. As I came up to "Trina" (name has been changed to protect the innocent) she was visibly upset. The other teacher had come over to help her and placed a hand on her shoulder and asked if she needed assistance. "Trina" was one of those individuals who doesn't like to be touched. Her personal space had been invaded and anxiety overwhelmed her.

We can't always know what others' foibles are. This is yet another reason it is so important to take the time to really get to know those who are parts of our worlds. When we take the time to do so, and allow others to know the same about us, we open the lines of communication to a point of clarity, thus messages, verbal or nonverbal, are clearly understood.

Remember, we all need our personal space. 

Keep looking up.   : )  AJ

Calendar Books by Allen James - Daily Reading - "The Journey: A Calendar Book"

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Calendar Books by Allen James reading for June 26th from "The Journey: A Calendar Book", 

"Enjoy a good meal" (James, 2012)

Now I know upon first reading today's posting there may be a resounding, "HUH?" But again, it's another of those "obvious" which is taken for granted. I'm not just saying, "Enjoy a good meal"...I'm saying, "ENJOY a good meal". This consists of much more than just having favorite foods.

Long gone are the days of sitting around the family dinner table sharing a meal. Since the arrival of the TV dinner in the early 1950s, the migration from the dining room to the TV trays in the living room/den was inevitable. And we all know in the 21st century most "meals" are "enjoyed" while on the go; a protein bar here, a yogurt there, fast food in the vehicle. Along with the loss of the family meals as well went the gathering together of the family to share their days and connect with one another.

Enjoying a "good meal" means not only savoring the flavor and healthfulness of the foods we eat, but also savoring the time of relaxation which comes with the "good meal". 

"Back in the day" (a phrase I all too often here more and more as I "mature), or, "In my day", all  10 of us (Mamaw lived with us at the time), were EXPECTED to be at the table, hands washed, in our regular seats, at meal time.  Even as I was in my teens, my father having been a career military man, we followed understood "rules"; the "God is great, God is good, let us thank him for our food.  By his hands, we are fed, bless this meal oh Lord we pray", was said before each meal on a rotating basis, oldest to youngest; food was passed from left to right; if someone asked, "Pass the potatoes", the word "Please" best follow, and if one decided to grab a serving prior to passing whatever had been asked to be passed across the table, the consequences weren't enjoyable (Once I used the salt and pepper before passing it to whomever had asked for it and spent the remainder of the meal on the couch in the living room holding the glass salt and pepper shakers, only to finish my meal after everyone else finished).  Nobody else minded, save my mother, who usually cringed at the strict discipline but supported her husband wholeheartedly, (in front of us anyway) as there were always a set of shakers at both ends of the large table as well as two sticks of butter and two plates of white bread.  There was always plenty to go around.  I question today how in the world it was accomplished, rearing such a large family, on only a retired 1st sergeant's retirement check.  Then when finished with our meals we always asked, "May I be excused please?"  Then took our plates and glasses to the kitchen, scrapped anything left on the plate (and there best be only crumbs) into the trash can and stacked them beside the sink.  Although it may sound horrific to some, we can see today how the discipline of the past could serve generations since much better than the, "Do what you please" attitude of following generations.

Family meal time teaches proper manners, social skills, communication skills while strengthening relationships between parents/children and siblings; and also allows for the appropriate digestion of foods.

A "good meal" is much more than a stop for fast food on the go. A "good meal" is much more than satisfying our need for nutrition. A "good meal" is something in today's world which comes much too seldom but is much too needed.

Enjoy a good meal....REALLY enjoy a good meal, and find out what you're missing out on. Then you'll question less, "What ever happened to the American family". 

Keep looking up.   : )  AJ

Calendar Books by Allen James - Daily Reading

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Calendar Books by Allen James daily reading for June 25th..."When you think of an invention that sounds like a best seller, think again before acting on it" (James, 2012).

I personally find today's reading to be pretty hilarious (Although I don't hear the sound of throngs of laughter from my audience). I was talking with an old friend some time ago and our discussion went to events which took place over 25 years ago. As we talked about how the experiences of years past mold us into who we become, I couldn't help but think how unfortunate it is many of the "experiential lessons" we learn through the "school of hard knocks" seem to never be given a 2nd opportunity to be applied.

However, there are times when our decision making skills can be kept in check simply by "thinking again". Through the years I've had numerous "great ideas" for inventions, none of which I'll name here for fear someone will take it and run with it : ) ... A friend of mine, we'll call Jim, and I would sit out on my back deck for hours coming up with invention after invention which we KNEW would be a best seller, only to never follow through with their development.

But there was a time when I decided to do just this, to follow through. I developed the idea all the way through to the creation of a prototype of the item. I then contacted the location of the Got an Invention? office in St. Louis and set up an appointment to see them. On the day of the appointment I drove all the way up to West Port, got out of the car, walked up to the entrance of the building, and then turned around and went home. I had chickened out. I had enough time on the drive up to "rethink" my idea and talk myself into believing it was all about getting money out of me (they were going to charge me $350.00 to even consider my idea).

Was it best to turn around and leave? More than likely; two years later I saw my exact item on a blockbuster movie at the theater. I'm sure it took more than two years for it to go from thought to product creation; someone else had already thought of the idea and developed it before I.

The point? Always think things through. Check out your options. Research your avenues. Don't expend time and energy when it can be spent in activity more productive.

Keep looking up. : ) 
AJ

Calendar Books by Allen James - Daily Reading - "The Journey: A Calendar Book"

 

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Calendar Books by Allen James reading for June 24th. ...from "The Journey: A Calendar Book"....

"Go by where Grandma used to live ever so often and recall" (James, 2012).

For a majority of us who are "middle aged", who we are can be attributed to the "old country", as a co-worker of mine terms, "back in the day"; values instilled in us through the examples reflected in our grandparents while visiting "the old home place".

Although each of our experiences with our grandparents are varied, just as the names we called them (Ma-maw, Papaw; Me-maw, Granddaddy; Mimmie, Pop-paw), the lessons learned and the values which make up who we are can not be what they are without the mixture of those modeled by
our family elders.

The afternoons of swinging on Ma-maw's front porch, walks to the outhouse in the dark of night, hours of Hide-n-seek on Saturday visits, or just the quiet evenings sitting in her lap by the old coal stove embraced by her time worn arms; we were more aware in those moments than we knew.

Grandparents are different now; younger it seems, active and healthy, thank goodness. However, children still learn much from their family elders; this never changes.

Going by where Ma-maw used to live ever so often, even though the house is no longer standing, I am reminded of the love and care which I received there; the smells, sounds, tastes, and yes, even the sights of my childhood come rushing back to urge me to always remember.....we must always remember from where we came and the roots which brought us to the point we now inhabit.

Take the trip....go by where your grandparents used to live and recall.....you'll be glad you did.

And as always...keep looking up. : ) AJ

Calendar Books by Allen James - Daily Reading - "The Journey: A Calendar Books"

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Calendar Books by Allen James' reading for June 23rd from "The Journey: A Calendar Book"....

"Know who you really are, then try your best to fake everyone out".

Let's face it, no matter how much we know ourselves or no matter how positive our self-image is, there are still aspects about ourselves we would like to improve or we don't like.

When we tout we don't care what others think about us we're lying to ourselves. These aren't negative attributes at all. Continuing to better ourselves is important in working toward personal success. It keeps us on our toes.

Maslov's "Hierarchy of Needs" tops out at self-actualization", or in other words, enlightenment or perfection. I don't believe we can get there in this existence.

Certainly we strive to attain it, but reaching self-actualization would mean we have nothing more to attain. We would become complacent, thus stagnant.

When we accept this and really know ourselves, we can then model who we wish to attain to be. "Faking everyone out" is surely putting it blunt....but this the reality. Accepting who we are requires being truly honest with ourselves.

As Shakespeare said in so many words, the world is a stage, we are but actors in it.

Be true to yourself....and always....keep looking up. AJ

Calendar Books By Allen James - Daily Reading

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Calendar Books by Allen James posting for June 20th is interestingly enough, a quote from the father of the modern "power of positive thinking" movement (no...not Norman Vincent Peale) and author of As a Man Thinketh, James Allen.

"You are today where your thoughts have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you" (James Allen, 1902)

People often say to me, "What is it about your life that keeps you so upbeat all the time?" Or I'm asked, "What is it you are doing different than me?" Consider for a moment the following scenario:

You and your buddy down the street have gone to all the same seminars, attended the same workshops, learned the same techniques and formulae for personal success. Yet, he appears to be happier, more fulfilled, living personal successes every day. 

Most times, the difference isn't in what he's doing, but in the person performing them. 

Your friend down the street already knows the secret to practice and personal success. What’s your buddy's secret? Is he smarter than you? NO. Is he a better person than you? NO. Did he go to a better school than you? Most likely not—he’s just learned how to harness his personal power to allow him to become the successful, self-empowered person he is. He’s learned how to create his own breakthroughs, to allow him to move beyond his fears and limiting beliefs. He is accomplishing goals and realizing his true desires, turning dreams into reality, creating fulfilling relationships, and modeling the strategies of peak performers to produce a quantum difference in his life. 

“Just what does it take to get ahead these days? Why can’t I get motivated? Why aren't my personal life and career turning out the way I want?” 

So, what gives? Who succeeds and why? What does it take to become the best version of yourself possible? Is it the quality of the school you attended? Is it that grade you got on your licensing exam? The number of letters after your name? Sometimes. 

Many of us know stories about people who were at the top of their class, yet, somehow, never achieved success. In other instances, there are those who got mediocre grades, or didn’t go to the top schools, who become leaders in their chosen fields. It got me thinking: 

While, arguably, some people experience a better all around educational experience, the bottom line is, YOU are ultimately responsible for your success or failure, both in business and in real life. It’s all about what YOU create. That’s why there is a discrepancy between being at the top of your class and your level of success /failure/mediocrity in the real world! 

Many times, we may find ourselves on the wrong road in life’s journey and not know how we got there. We may have no clue as to how to get the things we want and need for a fulfilling life. We feel stuck. 

What if you could create the life style you've always dreamed of? What if you could do it in a low stress environment? What if you could find the perfect balance between your personal and professional life? 

What would your life look like if there were no rules and you couldn't fail?

The way you interpret your life experience creates your identity.

“It's been said, all is an illusion. That's an insufficient distinction; more accurately, it's all a perception. “ 
--- Eldon Taylor

From the time you were born, you've received both positive and negative messages from your surroundings. Throughout my life, my mother told a story about how when she was a little girl she was kidnapped for a day as ransom for her father's gambling debts. For years I had an unfounded fear of being grabbed on the streets and taken captive; my subconscious mind would run the tape of my mother's story.

Mom’s words had become my reality.

All those messages, indelibly programmed into your subconscious combine to create your belief system. They become the filters through which we create our reality…our self-image, acting on them as if they’re true. While they don’t change the world around us, they filter our life experience until we believe them to be true. 

You become the person you think you are. If you think you’re someone who will never amount to anything… guess what? You’re correct. 

Rethink the thoughts which started your day. If you need to, reword and restate the inner conversation which you internalize as you go about your "living". We have no one to blame but ourselves for the outcome of each moment.

Keep looking up.  : )  AJ