Calendar Books by Allen James - Daily Reading - "The Journey: A Calendar Book"

Calendar Books by Allen James reading for October 20th from The Journey: A Calendar Book,

"Visit the grave of a friend or loved one when you can (It'll make you feel better)".

Growing up I was one of those individuals who thought, when I grew up I'd regularly visit the grave of my parents, friends, grandparents, siblings; however when I got there (meaning grown up), my understanding of "the grave" had changed to the extent I rarely find myself sitting or standing by friends and loved ones graves talking to the ground thinking they can hear me.

But this doesn't mean I NEVER do it. When I return to my hometown to visit, which isn't very often thanks for my busy work life, I always stop by Rosedale Cemetery where Mom, Dad, Mamaw, Grandpa, Cindy, PC, and other close family members were laid to rest, and say a "Hello", or "Just stopping by". I'll often straighten the worn and torn American flags in front of Dad's gravestone, or pull weeds from around others, always thinking how silly it is to think aloud TO them, but at the same time knowing I'm thinking aloud TO ME as well; cementing further the compassion these individuals instilled in me through their living years on this planet, and cultivating further the energy they continue to emit through me.

I recently visited the grave of an old friend. Every time I go, I'm sure it will be the last time. She was a teacher, a mother, a daughter. We had been friends all our life when her life was taken much too early.

We had not spoken in several years. I knew I would be welcomed if I called, but I didn't, til one day, years later, something she once said to me popped into my head. I remembered it, word for word, and marveled at the fact. I thought, well, maybe its time I look up her number and reconnect. Maybe she is thinking of me just as I am her. I Googled her name and the name, and ending up getting her obituary. She'd died suddenly at the age of 36, three months earlier.

That was early 2010, and I've been out to visit her grave about twice a year since then, but always on her September birthday. I missed her last few birthdays of life, and I always feel I want to make up for it somehow. She'd once said her family often forgot her birthday, but she knew I would always remember. I do now.

I want you to know this all seems very silly to me. I know my friend is not there in a piece of ground. I know life is for the living. Yet I drive the hundred miles to sit on a piece of grass in the hills, and talk to her. Why would any rational human do this?

Who cares if it seems like a silly thing to do. If it works for you, I say go for it. Any opportunity to dispel loneliness for someone or a chance to reconnect with those you care so much for, is an opportunity worth taking.

Remember, not everyone moment is going to be a happy one.

Keep looking up. AJ